Dreams

Last night I dreamed that I went to Ohio for a week but I forgot to tell my boss that I was going. However, I had seen a branch of my work in the area and thought maybe I could go there instead. The problem was that it was 8:30am on Monday morning and I was at the mall.

Luckily, I found my cousin who happened to be at the mall at 8:30am buying roller skates and she agreed to take me. On the way I was trying to think of a good reason to tell my boss when I called why I was in Ohio without informing her previously. I panicked for awhile before I woke up in bed relieved that I was not in Ohio after all. And it was 4:30am so I could still sleep for a few hours. Dream success or unfortunate nightmare?

In other news, I was googling "Silly, Honest, Kind" to find this blog again so I could write this post and I discovered that it is actually part of a famous Ralph Waldo Emerson quote that is very popular in soccer mom blogs.

Sorry Mr. Emerson for unintentionally plagiarizing you. My intent with the title of this blog was to think of three words that described me. Nothing is unique I suppose! I will probably rename it..

Today is Monday and I will be going to the Body Works class at LA Fitness at 5:45pm. It's pretty difficult but I enjoyed it last week.

OK Monday, here goes nothing.

What Day Is It?

A couple people have said some things to me that both hit home and helped me realize that I am more than capable of meeting my goals. I've had both the nice and kind love: The only thing in your way is yourself. Act like the person you want to be and think the thoughts you want to think, and eventually that will be who you are and what you think (fake it till you make it!). Take it one day at a time, that's all you can do. And I've had the tough love: The choice is yours, you either do or you don't. If you really want it, you will find a way to make it happen. Just do it!

Both of these kinds of love are so true and mean a lot to me. Even if one of those people is paid to tell me those things, I know they are on my side and supporting me. Even if I know all of those things, and I do, and I have told myself them in the past, it means very much to me to hear them from people that I care about. I know I'm not in this alone. That said, I may not be alone, but I'm the only one that can make this happen for myself. So, here I am again at Day 1, but just like B says.. two steps forward and one step back is still one step forward. And just like J says.. all I have control over is today. I either did or I didn't.

And today, I did. It wasn't Jillian, because I think maybe I'm just not fully up to Jillian yet if I'm honest with myself, and doing something is better than nothing. I did this video, and kicked it up a notch. I burned a lot of calories (though I'm not sure how many!), and damn if I don't feel good and proud of myself. 

JUST DO IT!!!!!!!

Tomorrow I am going to wake up and give C25K another shot. I found a grassy path behind my apartment and I am going to retry it on that terrain so hopefully my shin won't hate me for it as much.

I think only J really reads this anymore, and this is mostly directed towards him, but thank you for being patient with me while I am on this path to bettering myself. It's not easy and I know I can be frustrating when I fall off the metaphorical bandwagon, but you always are there staying positive and encouraging me even though I know it would be easier to say, "what are you doing!? Just go out there and do it!" I do believe in myself and I can do this. Thank you for believing in me too.

I know some of these blog entries are me just talking myself into keeping my goals and restarting, but I think a year from now I will look back and appreciate my journey more when I remember how difficult it was. Who knows, maybe someone else at this point will someday read this and realize that they can do it too. That even I (who by then will be fit, healthy, and happy obviously!) had hiccups and lived the struggle. You can do it! And so can I.

The Iron Lung

First I wanted to just say that today I was informed that I received the top bonus for my October meters! I received $250 and the main director of operations at our corporate office sent me an email thanking me for my hard work. It feels nice to be acknowledged! Plus money!

Now that that is out of the way, today I wanted to write a little about something interesting I read today and did a little further research on. I really enjoy reading and learning and thought it was prime time I begin sharing some of what I learn daily with my little section of the internet.

Polio

Not many people nowadays really know what Polio is. They know that it is a debilitating illness that happened far in the past that they don't have to worry about. The truth is though, that in the not too distant past Polio was Boogeyman come to life that paralyzed nearly 300,000 people, with estimates from 10 to 20 million polio survivors worldwide. Parents and children alike were terrified of Polio, especially considering it struck the young more readily. In the first half of the 20th century, with WWII raging on, a polio pandemic struck Europe, North America, Australia, and New Zealand. There was and is currently no cure for the disease, and there was no vaccine that we taken for granted today.

An unlucky young victim of polio in the 1940s maybe have swam in a public swimming pool, drank after someone, or forgot to wash their hands. After a few days, he would have begun to feel ill as if he had a flu (fever, sore throat, headache, fatigue, etc). Soon after he may have begun to have trouble walking, have poor reflexes, muscle spasms, and even sudden paralysis. He may have woken one day and found himself in some horrific, medieval torture-device-looking monstrosity like this:

"No, no one forced me to smile I swear."

The Iron Lung

The Iron Lung did just that. It did not provide oxygen, but by using negative pressure it forced the lungs of the patient to expand and contract. It used pure force to lovingly force your polio-ridden air beasts to suck up life-giving breath. Patients needing the iron lung had paralysis such that their diaphragm was unable to work the lungs on its own. If our young victim was lucky he would spend only a few months in the summer in an iron lung. If he was really lucky, he would spend about 2 weeks before being strong enough to breathe on his own. If he was particularly unlucky he would spend upwards of a two years or more forgetting what his lower extremities look like. And he won't be alone. There will be many children sharing his fate. 

Many

Many

Many children.

It's easy to read and look at pictures about something that happened decades before you were even thought of, but what was it really like to be little Billy (I named him)? Let's say it's 1952 when polio was at its peak. Billy is 9 and lives in a nice little town that he has never left. He comes down with something, and a few days later is rushed off to the hospital. Billy, who runs, jumps, and chases his dog for a living, suddenly can't feel his left leg anymore and is struggling to breathe. He is utterly terrified in this new place, with these new people, and is hearing adults whispering about polio when they think they are out of earshot. Billy has known a many kids already who have gotten polio, and a few who died. How would you feel? What were you doing when you were 9? 

Shortly after he has trouble breathing, he is whisked away again to a distant hospital that has one of the very expensive iron lungs (as costly as a house in today's dollars). He still hasn't been told anything about what is going on because in 1952 people didn't care quite so much about Billy's mental state. He falls asleep or maybe passes out at some point and when he wakes up he can't see his body anymore.

Billy says goodbye to his body.

Because Billy's family is solidly working class people, his parents can't afford to visit him except very few and far between times. Billy is alone, scared, and can't understand why he can't get out of the machine because still no one has told him what it is doing for him. Maybe Billy is lucky (but not too lucky) and only has to spend 6 months in the iron lung. During this time Billy will probably see his parents once or twice, and will spend much of his time alone. One iron lung patient described his experience much like Billy. He recalled a few terrifying moments when one of the "port holes" on the side of the machine came open and he was unable to call to help because he couldn't breathe. Miraculously each time a nurse found him struggling (this was prior to alarms being put on the machine). I don't know about you, but that just makes me want to gulp in some fresh air and pass out from oxygen overdoses.

Billy probably spent some time talking with other children (though sadly many of his new friends would die before he goes home), being read to by kind nurses, and possibly even learning some things in the absence of school or listening to the radio. One survivor describes forgetting how to write, walk, and read in his time spent in an iron lung.

Billy's little sister can't figure out what the hell he is doing.

This guy just wants to be read to.

A few years after Billy recovers as best he can (he might still be able to walk with crutches), the polio vaccine will come out. Mothers and grandmothers will cry, and children will line up at school to eat a flavored sugar cube containing the vaccine. It wasn't without controversy, as there were cases of the vaccine giving polio to some recipients, but it would largely wipe out the pandemic of polio, killing the Boogeyman.

Today

 Today the iron lung is all but retired. We now use positive pressure ventilation, which consists of intubating patients so that oxygen goes directly into their lungs. Amazingly, there are still people in iron lungs today. June Middleton died in 2009 at 83. She spent 60 insane years in an iron lung after she contracted polio at age 22. There are estimated fewer that 40 people still using an iron lung today.

As for polio, despite Bill Gates' best efforts, it is still around. There is still no cure for polio. It has largely been eradicated in the developed world because of the polio vaccine, but there are fears that it might resurface due to the anti-vaccine movement that irrational, ignorant parents have jumped on. Please vaccinate your kids.

In the third world, polio is still a large problem. In Pakistan and Africa right now there is an outbreak of polio due to the Taliban banning inoculation, and being openly hostile to the World Health Organization's (WHO) attempts to vaccinate the 20+ million children in those countries. Recently a strain of the virus in Syria that has crippled 13 children was linked to Pakistan.  That has to stop, seriously.


Thanks for reading guys. Leave me some feedback and let me know if you found this interesting, informative, boring, too long, etc. I'm off to get my butt kicked by Jillian! See you next time.

Tuesday Again

Hi everyone. I definitely haven't posted like I wanted to last week. The weekends really throw me off and I need to find the right balance with them. That said, this weekend won't be much different, though it will be much fun! We are doing a 5k this Saturday. My first one! We are driving to Sebring Friday evening, staying with some friends, and the four of us are doing the 5k Saturday morning. Saturday evening we are going to a Halloween party that our friends are throwing in Sebring. We are going to make some pumpkin dip (!!!) and bring graham crackers and apple slices for dipping. Can't wait! Sunday evening we are going to HHN.. Who all is going is yet to be determined. This week I still need to make my costume (Hypatia) and get things ready for the weekend. 

I won't say much more in this short update, but I've been working hard on myself and being honest with myself and others. I have been eating well still, but I haven't done my 30 Day Shred since before this weekend :\. I feel a bit bummed about it, but I'm also not going to hide under a rock because of one (or 2-5) slip ups. I still got this. I'm also not going to put so much pressure on myself that I must do every single day or I'm a failure. Because I'm not! Even small successes are at still successes. 

All that said, I almost didn't update this evening because I was nervous about what I would say, but then I saw this Reddit AMA by the beautiful Allie Brosh: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/1ozt33/i_am_allie_brosh_the_drawwriter_of_hyperbole_and/

She writes a great comic, Hyperbole and a Half. She's an inspiration and I love her work. Her new book is coming out Thursday! Remind me in three or four pay checks to get it. I love her and she helps remind me that I love me, even if things don't always go exactly as I envision. It's pretty silly to kick yourself when your down, isn't it? Tomorrow I will do another day of the Shred, and Satuday I will participate In my first 5k, even if I have to walk the whole way (I don't plan to.) This weekend will be a blast, next week is Halloween, and in two weeks J and I are celebrating 4 awesome years. 

Goodnight everyone! Here's to another step forward. Love you guys.

Enjoy this random picture from my iPad, since that is where I'm updating from and I want a picture on this post:

My preeeeecious....

Tuesday Tuesday!

Hello my loyal readers!

So this weekend was really great again. J and I finished watching season 2 of American Horror Story, and watched the first episode of season 3. Season 2 was a lot more gory than the first season and I missed a lot of the mystery of the first as well, but it got a lot better towards the end. It ended a little strangely character-wise, but all in all I give it a solid B rating. The first episode of season 3 was great. This season is based on a coven of witches, and I really enjoyed where they seem to be going with it. J said that the creators really took to heart some of the criticism of the second season (too much blood and gore!) and fingers crossed that things will be different this time around.

We also watched the Blair Witch Project, which has really stood up against the test of time. It still freaked me out quite a bit! We made some delicious meals including my BBQ chicken flatbread pizza (so easy to make, healthy, and fast). I will definitely be making this again in the near future. We also made some pumpkin honey beer bread. It was really delicious! Again pretty darn easy to make. A great first foray into fall-themed recipes.

Since I haven't yet brought this to the attention of my blog, I will tell you that I have stopped doing the C25K. I definitely want to revisit it in the future, but at the current moment I had to make a judgment call because running on the asphalt was really killing my lower-extremities. My shin splint that I thought I had I believe may have actually been an injury, and continuing to run on it wasn't a good idea. Never fear though, I have picked up an alternative! I am doing Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred videos. I have done two days now and they are KILLER. She is a real hard-ass and makes you work hard, but that's why I like her! I'm now doing strength training and cardio with the video in my apartment and my shin is thanking me for it. I think I may actually be burning more calories doing this! Her video consists of stretching, pushups, "skipping rope", running in place, etc. I still need to buy some small weights (3-5lbs) for some of her exercises. Since it's a 30 DAY Shred, you guessed it, it is 30 days straight! I believe there are one or two days off, but I think I'm up for this. People have lost up to 30 pounds doing this, so I'm excited! Once I get through it I may start doing p90x or maybe one of her other videos. Or maybe I will revisit C25K with a little lighter "load" and my shin won't hate me as much.

Anyway, I will be back tomorrow (PROMISE!!!). If anyone is still reading this, feel free to bug me if I haven't posted in awhile. And I appreciate everyone always asking me how it's going and if I'm still on track. It keeps me honest!

Have a good day tomorrow guys!

(Irrelevant picture that I thought was cool. Now this is the way to stack wood!)

Homemade, Healthy Egg McMuffin Alternative

So I don't often go to McDonalds, but when I do it is for breakfast and I get the a sausage biscuit. I almost always hate myself afterwords (or rather, my body hates me). Fear not! Regret and despair do not have to become a part of your morning routine. That is something I can love! I borrowed this recipe from The Yummy Life, with only slight variations added. It is healthy, quick, and easy to make ahead and pop in the oven or microwave for quick, healthy, filling breakfasts.

Stats:

Time to Make: ~45 minutes
Makes: 12 egg sandwiches
Serving Size: 1 sandwich
Calories: 229
Carbs: 13g
Fat: 14g
Protein: 18g
Sodium: 546g
Sugar: 3g

Ingredients:

• 12 whole wheat english muffins
• 12 brown eggs
• 12 slices of cheese (I used Sargento - Ultra Thin Slices - 45 calories each)
• 12 turkey sausage patties (I used Jimmy Dean maple turkey), or Canadian bacon
• Salt & Pepper
• any veggies you would like to add

Instructions

 (I forgot to add the english muffins in this picture, but each package has 6 muffins, so you will need two if you want to make a dozen.)

 Cook the sausage (or turkey) according to package directions. For the Jimmy Dean turkey sausages, you essentially just heat them up in the pan.

 Crack the eggs into a muffin pan. You can also use any oven-safe container that you have. The goal is to make them patty-shaped so that they fit easily onto the muffin.

Salt and Pepper eggs to taste. The salt is unnecessary because the sausage has a lot in it already. You can also break the egg yolk at this step if you wish to get the yolk to spread around a bit more. For an even healthier alternative, consider egg beaters or egg whites. Next time I make these I will also be adding veggies into this step. If you have any (peppers would be great!) add them here.

Bake the eggs in the oven at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes. The longer you leave them in the "harder" they will be, so it is a personal preference. Be sure they are cooked thoroughly.

This is what mine looked like after! 

While the eggs are cooking, split the muffins onto a pan. If you want like them toasted, toast them at this step. I put my muffins in the oven and set it to broil for about 2 minutes. Perfectly toasted! Place the cheese on one side of the muffin and fold in the corners so the cheese doesn't hang over.

Assemble your ingredients!

 Yummmmmm!!!

 Did I mention.....

 That I LOVE my camera!?!?

Once you have assembled your delicious muffins and resisted all temptation to eat them straight away, wrap them up in wax paper or aluminum foil depending on whether you want to reheat them by microwave or oven. Throw them in the freezer, and enjoy the next 2 weeks of delicious, quick, and easy grab-and-go breakfast! I had one of these for dinner (couldn't resist!) and it was delicious. I recommend microwaving them for 1-2 minutes at full power.

Another tip: Add any fresh veggies that you don't wish to freeze when you are heating them up. I will probably eat mine with spinach and maybe tomato. They would be good with sauce as well! 

 Bonus shot of the freezer. My roommate is a food pack-rat. With at poorly as she eats, she must have some interesting bathroom visits! (The only thing that is mine in this freezer is the flatbread pizza, turkey burgers, ground turkey, and chicken.

 And because by this point I was having fun with my camera, here is a shot of my shelf in the pantry! Lots of good food here :)

Yes, these are 4 large boxes of donuts that my roommate inexplicably has on the counter! 

My dinner :) 

I hope you enjoy! Leave a comment if you tried them and have any suggestions or if you did something differently. I'd love to hear! My next recipe with likely be either turkey chili or flatbread BBQ chicken pizza. I may also make some pumpkin-honey beer bread this weekend! Until next time.

Sigur Ros Still Buzzing On My Mind

I'm just doing another quick update today. This week seems to be flying by and I'm having a harder time finding time to update. This morning I did my work out and it was cold! It didn't stay that way as I got moving though. I'm loving the weather the last few days. Fall is so awesome and I wish it could last forever. I don't want to wish it away, but I'm always looking forward to these weekends and doing fun fall things with J. Speaking of, I think we may take part in a 5K run/walk the last weekend of October! It's a Halloween themed 5K, and I really can't think of a better way to make my first plunge into running 5Ks.

Last night I went grocery shopping and got a lot of good food. The difference between this trip and others is that I don't have a ton of "grab and go" food. I have ingredients now to make a few recipes: English muffin egg sandwiches, creole chicken w/ brown rice, flatbread BBQ chicken/veggie pizza, and turkey chili. I did by some low-carb wraps for "sandwiches." Most of these are things I will make ahead of time and eat throughout the week for meals. Tonight I will be making the egg sandwiches. I'm going to take pictures, so expect an update on that soon. 

Oh and a short public service announcement: I am going LOW-CARB!! Well, lower carb that is. I briefly considered going no carb but then I remembered I am not a crazy person. We will see where this journey (and the "carb withdrawal flu") will take me. 

One more day until Friday! 

Last night's dinner: Veggie burger with Gorgonzola and walnut salad. (Sadly they didn't have my Gorgonzola salad at the grocery store so I could restock up!)